self-medicating with meditation

In the course of the past year or so, I have (rather unintentionally) conducted a body/mind science experiment on myself. The initial question at hand, "What happens when you stop meditating?" Due to my total consumption with my new career in education, during my first year of teaching, I allowed my yoga practice to wither away. Sure, I still stretched now and then. Sometimes I even sat cross-legged on a pillow and breathed with my eyes closed. They say there's no wrong way to meditate. But there is: by continuing to hop on looping trains of thought that beat up your inner self. My sitting practice became rarer and rarer until it dwindled to almost never.

Though I didn't outwardly state my hypothesis, I had a sinking feeling that if I didn't practice, I would eventually lose my cool, at best, lose my sanity at worst. Well, the data was collected, and the results were clear. Not meditating leads to personal disaster. My life in shambles, I was teetering on the brink of depression, wrestling muscular self-doubt. I had officially landed (albeit floating down like a feather rather than going SPLAT!) at rock bottom.

That was back in April of 2007. Thankfully I was able to swim (upstream) to a life preserver. My only choice was to get back to the practice. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but that it would effectively restore my life back to its rightful owner. And, after 8 months of disciplined practice (typically sitting in meditation for 10-30 minutes a day), plus attending yoga classes weekly and practicing several times a week at home, I feel worlds better. I am a better teacher, daughter, friend and human. Life is still a struggle, but with a dose of meditation as my daily medication, it's a struggle that I can face... and even enjoy.

The catch-22 about having a strong spiritual practice (yoga/meditation, or tai-chi, or whatever it is for you... beer drinking excluded!) is that once you have the practice established, cutting back is not recommended, and quitting is downright detrimental. But, trust me, the benefits far outweigh the difficulties of the practice. Meditate for sanity, to become a beacon of peace, to get clear on your goals and dreams, to cultivate compassion, to de-stress. Its effects are more magical and fast-acting than any pill, I promise.